These woods, are some hiking and biking trails that are quite close to our house, so a quick car ride is all it takes to get here.
Many times when she was still in high school we would come here after school to walk the dogs and to discuss her day. What went right, what went wrong, classes she loved, classes she didn't.
On Sunday afternoons we would come and discuss the bigger questions; what classes to take next year, boys or the lack there of, what to wear to the prom, what college, will she get married, will she have kids.
The conversations haven't always been easy or dry-eyed on either one of our parts, but they have always left a deep impact on me. Just last week we had one of those conversations here. She was adjusting to being back home from her first year of college and struggling with who she is now. Is she the strong, confident person she has become at college or is she Glen and Sarah's daughter trying to fit back into the family unit. In reality she is both, she just had to find the balance between them.
I, also was adjusting, to losing a big chunk of my free time, having to wake her up in the morning for appointments (not an easy task), different schedules for everyone, more laundry, plus helping her look for a car.
This was not an easy conversation for either one of us, but one we needed to have to clear the air between us. Tears were shed by both of us, but the outcome was so worth it. A better understanding of where each of us was coming from and a better understanding of where we needed to go. Things improved greatly after that conversation and things for the most part are happily different yet the same.
I know we will have more deeply meaningful conversations here; talk about jobs, where to live, wedding plans.
I've recently had one of those hard, but good talks with my mom too. As the mother-daughter dynamic changes as we both get older it's hard not to have growing pains, but I think with talks like these we're both learning to have a better balance and a stronger relationship. I hope the same is true for you and your daughter (it sounds like it is from the way you write!).
ReplyDeletep.s. I'm also in the 31 things class and found the link to your blog there.
Thanks Megan for sharing from the daughter perspective.
DeleteA great post I too have had long conversations with my daughter but they tend to be on neutral territory usually over a coffee in our favourite coffee shop.
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